12 hours

It is officially 12 hours till Christmas morning and I am totally unprepared. The strange thing is I have achieved a zen-like calm about the whole thing. Sadly it can also be called "why bother". It seems I have 3 garbage bags of toys to wrap and a bike to assemble. Tomorrow night. Yeah. Good times. I probably wouldn't feel so grinchy if I knew I was going to have help in this endeavor. There are a few things that married people neglected to mention to me before I got married. One of them is "All gift shopping will fall into your lap whether it is your relative or not." The other being "all announcements, notes, thank you, and birthday notices will fall into your lap." How is that so? Because I carry the most estrogen somehow makes you think that this is something I wish to do, or would even be good at? Well guess what, it's not. Sadly the only reason that I DO continue to do it, is that if I didn't it would never get done. The only thing that has kept me motivated is knowing that the kids will open their gifts Christmas morning (that I thought of, shopped for, bought, hid, wrapped, and placed under the tree) and their little faces will light up and I know that I, my good planning, put it there. And maybe some of the grinchy-ness will fade...

The DAY before the day I lose my mind.

Today is the Friday that is the beginning of Christmas break from school. Already I am wishing for the new year. Do they naturally get more wound up when they know there is an impending multi-day break from school and all activities? I am tired just thinking of all the time we have before school begins again. I am trying ,desperately, to think of places and things to keep them occupied and out of my hair. Several things are working against me:
1.The weather, it's too cold for them to play outside
2.Friends are all on winter vacations or off to see their own families
3.All the places offering "things" to do are expensive for all three kids.
4. Christmas isn't for another week so no new toys yet to keep them occupied.
5. Husband is still working until the day before so HE is not even here to keep them entertained.
6. In-laws are coming for several days and I have to find ways to entertain them too.
It's like the fun never ends around here. It feels weird to me to hear the other moms be so-o excited that their kids are on break.I am not one of those. I have learned to like my time away from them during the day as it makes me more patient and understanding (sometimes) when they do come home. But how can I miss them if they don't go away?

Farmer Tanner

A little free writing submission from my first grader:
"A tatpoll is a tatpoll intil it becomes a frog. A pig was a pig intil it is bakon."
Awesome. It's like the farmer gene was just handed to him. We don't eat reptiles, but pigs are fair game...It made me laugh out loud on a dreary Monday morning.

Nickeled and Dimed

I LOVE the public schools here in my town. They are on top of things, involved in the community and concerned for the kids welfare. They organize workshops on internet safety and offer enrichment programs for the kids after school. The only thing that drives me BATTY is that it seems EVERY week there is a note coming home about can I send in a couple of bucks here, donate this, or volunteer for something. If my schedule allows it I love to volunteer. But since frick and frack are in preschool, it's hard for me to match my schedule to the times they need me. Of course, when the holidays start in October, then all the "donation" lists come home. Can I send some food to the G,I.'s, can I send NEW hats, gloves or scarfs for the people who cannot afford them. And this year at our new elementary school they have an angel tree up AND have asked for $2.00 for to buy clothing for the students in need AND to donate food to the shelter. This all came home on one letter. On top of all the other "little" things that have come home that they "need" . It seems everytime I open the take home folder it is something. Don't get me wrong these are all superior needs that as a community we should meet, but I am tired of being begged. I have a family here who needs things also. There needs to be a line drawn. A little break as we are gearing up for the holidays. When the school year started they already said there would be 5 fundraisers. 5. Ocho. But none of these things were included. Sigh. I sound so stingy, but geesh it seems EVERY week there is something. Summer is starting to look cheaper than the school year. I am afraid for what is going to happen when all 3 of mine are in school. I will have to dip into their college fund to afford PUBLIC school .

Queen of Procrastination

Ahem, allow me to introduce myself. I love organization, to clean and be able to look over my house and say "I am done with that". But I have a test to study for and I am TIRED of studying. TIRED TIRED TIRED. I love all the stuff I am learning, but seriously, I do not test well and now I am just afraid that I am going to blow it. I tell my 7 year old all day that he has to study to get smart. He has to apply himself to learn anything, that it won't just come to him in a dream. Then here I sit thinking of all the other things I could be doing besides studying. Maybe this is just what moms going back to school go through. Surely I cannot be the only one. I feel like I am so used to multi-tasking every moment of every day, that when I sit and try to do a single task, I just cannot help but feel I am letting down my house and family.I need a "special place" to go to.. a calgon like zen to take over and allow me to get away mentally if not physically and FOCUS!

Bah-humbug

I don't think that I will ever understand why the holiday "season" must be such a rush. All I feel like I do is run around and prepare and attend and get and plan. I think the only one who can enjoy this season is the kids. They are the true beneficiaries of this preparation. This past weekend for Thanksgiving I washed and cleaned and cooked, then shopped and hid toys and made lists. Whew! Now I am hiding at the library because the house is too distracting and I am supposed to be studying. But what is my problem? All I can think of is the many things that I have to do for my kids/house/husband. Do this, be there, get ready for that... it never seems to end. NOW I understand why people go away for the ENTIRE 2 weeks of Christmas break vacation instead of staying at home. There is no work on vacation. You pay someone to do it all for you. WHAT A FABULOUS IDEA!!! Maybe next year, now that the kids are old enough, we could do that. Just the 5 of us somewhere awesome and all inclusive. Ahhh, it's good to have a goal.

Do they still make Calgon?

Let me preface this by writing, most days are not like this one. That being said, today was a day where I feel physically drained and totally hoarse from all the yelling. NO ONE wanted to listen. A threat was not enough to keep the kids in line. Grounding was not enough, impending hot sauce in the mouth was not enough, a threat of the spoon was not enough. It is as if they KNEW I was physically too tired to take them on. *sigh* I hope tomorrow will be better. The only thing that has kept me sane through this busy day, is the knowledge that as my kids were being a handful, no matter where we were, there was always another mom who would catch my looks of frustration, and nod her head in understanding. Thank God. There are others out there. Other moms who have been where I was today and didn't judge my threats issued through clenched teeth and furrowed brow. I think we should have a secret handshake and meetings where we could compare horror stories and brainstorm ideas to keep them in line.